By: Bil

Bil — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 11:22:02 +0000

1. My uncle once: nearly ruined the lives of 5 people
2. Never in my life: have I found a way to curb my hormones!
3. When I was five: I presumably looked very cute.
4. High school was: all about holding hands and kissing girls.
5. Once I met: myself and didn’t really like it.
6. I will never forget: the first time I saw a pig getting slaughtered!
7. Once I met: a japanese guy trapped in a Thai mans body
8. There’s this girl I know: who isnt really a girl
9. Once, at a bar: I didn’t get drunk. Just once though.
10. By noon, I’m usually: sleeping soundly
11. Last night: I was drinking from a bucket of whiskey in a DJ booth with a female DJ and her cute friends til 6am, choosing CDs for her to mix.
12. If only I had: power.
13. Next time I go to church: I will develop a headache
14. What worries me most: my brother being unhappy
15. When I turn my head left I see: my wall
16. When I turn my head right I see: my door
17. You know I’m lying when: I dont lie.
18. What I miss most about the Eighties is: Mighty MOUSE
19. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: puck
20. By this time next year: I will be fatter, richer and addicted to more substances than at present.
21. A better name for me would be: god
22. I have a hard time understanding: people who dont favour education.
23. If I ever go back to school, I’ll: finish my thesis on deviant logic
24. You know I like you if: your computer still works after I’ve known you for a week.
25. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: whoever gave it to me
26. Take my advice, never: piss me off! Im dangerous even to myself!
27. My ideal breakfast is: pizza at 4pm.
28. A song I love but do not have is: none
29. If you visit my hometown, I suggest you: watch the 6pm evening bbc news.
30. Why won’t people: think before they speak
31. If you spend a night at my house: expect my mother to mother you
32. I’d stop my wedding for: a simple request would probably do it.
33. The world could do without: pride
34. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: the cock of a bellyroach
35. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: dont know any
36. Paper clips are more useful than: most people who “work” online.
37. If I do anything well it’s: being right.
38. And by the way: I rule.

Comments on: My 38 Surprises

By: Bil